@Paperdaisy wrote:
Question 2: What are some common misconceptions and is there anything you wish more people understood about ADHD?
One of the reasons it took me until the age of 27 to get diagnosed is because I believed the stereotype – that ADHD is for young boys who are rowdy and disruptive in school. It is now very clear to me that ADHD was named for what it appears like to others, rather than how it is experienced. ADHD is not a deficit of attention – it is an inability to regulate attention…and emotion, and motivation. In fact, one experience that we in the community refer to as ‘hyperfocus’ is something that prevented one of my friends from seeking diagnosis for many years. How could she have attention deficit disorder when she was able to sit and focus on something for hours at a time, sometimes to the point where she’d forget to eat or go to the bathroom?
ADHD really isn’t an issue with knowing, but with doing, and this is primarily to do with our dopamine deficiency a.k.a. the rewards system in the brain. When ordinary tasks fail to produce dopamine release like they do for others, is it any wonder the ADHDer will be compelled to seek out (or be distracted by) things that do produce dopamine?
Here’s a few other features that make it oh so fun:
Time blindness - cannot conceptualise time, i.e. I don’t know what 5 minutes feels like, I struggle to plan ahead because 6 weeks away and 12 weeks away might as well be the same thing
Hyperfocus - so involved in something, it is to the exclusion of everything else including bodily signals to eat, drink water, and go to the toilet. Also influences things like becoming hyperfocused on a new project or hobby, spending lots of time and resources on it, only to lose interest after a month or so and maybe never picking it up again
rejection sensitive dysphoria - an intense emotional reaction to real OR perceived rejection – this one is complex, you can read more here.
Emotional Dysregulation – Many ADHDers will find their emotional responses can seem ‘out of proportion’ to the experience they’re responding to. It is also more difficult to self-soothe, and we can be seen as ‘having a short fuse’ because we are quick to anger. Sometimes, my experience is like ‘nothing wrong nothing wrong nothing wrong EXPLODE’. This can lead to meltdowns, outbursts, break downs, you name it.
Context & recall - I’m very forgetful, and it is largely to do with two factors - a) My working memory cannot hold as much as other people’s and b) I can access memories but need extra context cues and reminders because it is the process of recall that is challenging.
Tangential thinking - ever spoken to someone who can somehow manage to cram four different topics into one sentence? Someone who goes off on wild, semi-related thoughts or will suddenly start talking about something seemingly random (but on inquiry they will tell you about the series of thoughts that lead them there)? That person might just have ADHD!
Object permanence – in psychology this refers to a developing child’s ability to realise that objects persist in existence even when out of sight (which is why up to a certain age, peek-a-boo is so entertaining, babies literally think you cease to exist). In the ADHD community, it refers to a tendency to forget things exist when we aren’t able to see them. This is why we lose things so frequently, due to misplacing them or putting them somewhere not easily seen. It is also impactful to relationships, which I’ll talk about later.
Sensory processing issues - everything is LOUD and BRIGHT. Sometimes I will get distracted because I can’t tune out noise. Sometimes, someone will say something and I will take a moment to actually process it, so I might say ‘pardon?’ then before they actually repeat themself I will start responding to them because my brain caught up midway through. I can’t actually process sounds that well unless I’m also fidgeting – such as the incident that helped get me diagnosed. This is also why I need instructions to be written down! If you tell me a list of things to do, I might do the first two, but then forget what the rest are. This is extra important in new jobs! Information overload is a struggle!
ALWAYS MESS - I mean if I’m not getting dopamine for completion of tasks, why the heck would I ever be motivated to tidy up? 🤣
