Lived Experience Forum

[Former-Member]

I've been so stressed out lately and I feel like I'm crashing into a dark place that I try really hard to stay out of. 

Now my baby sister is causing more stress. She is 21.  Sooo....

How would you tell a younger "adult" sibling that is apparently sick of being treated like a child but is making really stupid decisions you are there for them no matter what but if they get in trouble with the law or fall pregnant they gotta deal with the consequences like the adult they want to be treated without being insensitive or pushing them away

[HearU]

That's a hard one, giving younger siblings advice on how to be an adult. I guess we have to give it a go. It's all coming from the love we have for them so we warn and worry.

[Former-Member]

@HearU , especially with my up bringing me and some of my other siblings shielded her from a lot of shit we delt with and now she's hanging out with people who get messed up in the things she was shielded from like don't get me wrong me and all my siblings had shit childhoods but she carries on like she's had it the worst when what she went through was mostly being locked in rooms with distractions and older siblings picking up the slack for neglectful, absentee parents. I don't know how to help her see that need help both physically and psychologically without making her feel like I'm parenting her or picking on her or making her feel like I'm not there for her

[HearU]

Hi again @Former-Member your sis might be bucking the control you have had over her movements in the past. Could you see a counsellor together to talk more about your childhood conditions and the roles you both had? It seems sis lacks understanding of how it was for you and also feels like you don't understand how it was for her. It sounds like you've both been through a heap.