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Alessandra1992
Senior Contributor

2015 How will you plan to enjoy time with others?

The New Year is nearly upon us and I am not one for making any resolutions..but I do know learning to enjoy time with others was crucial to my wellness and continues to be so..
Wondering if anyone else has thoughts on friendship, community and being at home or peace with oneself..
All tips welcome, along with definitions of enjoying, who are the "others" that we might choose to spend time with?
This Forum is one of my favourite places to hang out! I am enjoying this place a lot!
25 REPLIES 25

Re: 2015 How will you plan to enjoy time with others?

Well Sandy i too enjoy spending time with my friends on this forum, and thankfully all going to plan i get my butt overseas, and make new friends abroad, i can still easily stay in touch with all the nice and friendly and good people here, the joys of the internet 🙂

my old friends etc, i haven't told anyone my plans, except for my long time best mate, he i will miss.

but with technology i will be able to keep in touch with him so that is my plan 🙂

 

Re: 2015 How will you plan to enjoy time with others?

Alessandra1992, my time will be shared by being on SANE, helping my friend in his shop and bed. But this forum has more for me than enywhere else. I love it and all who use it and I need them both.

loopy.

Re: 2015 How will you plan to enjoy time with others?

Hi Allessandra1992 aka Sandy,
Yes,yes, it's a little addictive .......checking to make sure my like minded friends are all here.........we don't hear from moderators as much thou hey ?...
I am thinking .....as lying here.....I've become my Mum's friend via support from Sane.

A few months ago....She was yelling over the phone and because you and me and others were agreeing that we are proud consumers.....I said to her, very gently, Mum, please mind my mental well being....... She has swiftly been changing. Of course, whenever I go and visit her and one of her many friends come over to visit, I usually hear all her friend's talk about my serious mental ill health issues.......her friends aren't very good at keeping secrets but the overall relief is good good.

I went back to work for about 2 months. I still haven't been paid properly though and worked out I just want to begin my own business because I'm completely over being a support worker.
Made some really wonderful friends like you and Kirsten and Loopy and oh.......
Just become so much sure in myself.....

What about you ?

Oh, new year ? Well, earlier, I went out on a date with a Jimbaroo.....someone who lives in the middle of Australia and manages stations. There's heaps of people fishing on coastline of W.A where I live.

My resolution is to type thoughtful and sometimes researched answers on Sane Forums.
To finish embroidering next handbag.
To keep on nagging my youngest son to give me the iPhone 4 which was supposed to have been given to me ages ago so I can use my computer to go on sane forums.

To walk Arlo every day for 30 minutes to an hour.

What about you ?

Re: 2015 How will you plan to enjoy time with others?

Hey @justanother47yr, that is fabulous news about your mum..I reckon as we change by not reacting to their misguided comments they change too! Funny how her friends still regard you as someone with serious mental health issues, some folks just like to gossip!

Me, well I think walking daily fits in with my nag less, move more theme of 2015!

I am about to go off the grid for holidays, no mobile reception..and whilst I am off grid I will be walking, swimming, playing cards, Othello, chatting, cooking and fingers crossed..napping!
I will hopefully have an opportunity to reflect on where I want to invest my energy, especially around the optional choices that I make daily, making a bag is a great idea. Haven't made one in years!
Mindfulness practice is going to stop being optional and become a necessary daily routine:)

How did your date go?

May the force be with you, Live long and prosper, Nanu Nanu 🙂
Sandy

Re: 2015 How will you plan to enjoy time with others?

Alessandra, a joke to travel with,

Q: How many ears does Picard have?
A: Three. A right ear. A left ear. And a final front ear.

Q: What is Captain Picards biggest pet peeve?
A: When the crew replaces his dilithium crystals with Folgers crystals.

Q: What do you call it when that Strategic Operations Officer on DS9 runs as fast as he can?
A: Worf Speed.

Q: What do you call 5 siths piled on top of a lightsaber?
A: A Sith-Kabob!

Q: Why does Princess Leia keep her hair tied up in buns?
A: So it doesn't Hang Solow!

Q: Why shouldn't you ask Yoda for money?
A: Because he's always a little short
Q: What program do Jedi use to view PDF files?
A: Adobe Wan Kenobi

 

loopy

Re: 2015 How will you plan to enjoy time with others?

my dear friends,

I had a really great night last night, i went to my mate's house as planned, except when i got there i was told we were going to another friends house..... Now i haven't properly spoken to this friend, and was not sure of my standing with him and his wife, both of who are quite close to my ex....

So i arrive there, his wife answers the door, and i can tell straight up that there is some definate awkwardness, general chit chat, nothing too meaningful, i admit i was feeling quite closed, but knew that i had my car if things got too buggy i could bail.

after a little i felt a bit more comfortable, but there was still that tension of the undiscussed, but feeling comfortable and ready to deal with what might come, i settled in a bit more and started drinking with my two mates ( i ended up getting fairly drunk )

So at about 1am, i am sitting with my two mates and his wife, and the questions came, we were all fairly boozed but not too stupidly, i calmly explained everything outright to them answered there questions, they told me that it was fcked what i did, but they also understood and upon hearing my side of the events they concluded that what she has been telling everyone is alot of lies with some truths and what i told them added up to be a lot of truth.

I also got the news which i already knew from my mate, he wasn't meant to tell me, but he has seen her and they had a big chat about alot of things, he informed me that she is seeing someone else, which i already pieced together who it is, and that she was seeing someone else.

it was very much a draining expierence, but definately worth it, my mates wife has alot of respect for me now and the awkwardness has gone, she has heard the story from both my ex and i and is ok with me.

They all made it very very clear that it was not right what i did

That if i ever did anything similar again that would be it.

but they love me and care for me and still want to be my friend

I don't expect any of my other friends will be like them, and from what i gathered from them a lot have already made up their minds on the whole thing.

I decided that as much as i want to know why she feels she can't talk to me about this stuff, i have to realise that i will probably never know. and i am ok with that

I have now told so many people about my plans to go travel the world, and the only response i have gotten back from every single person is - "That is a great idea, you should definately do it, clear your head, have fun, and see as much of the world as you can" it has been almost word for word from every person.

2015 - I will leave australia and begin my world travel, for as long or as short as i want, i will enjoy my life, i will cherish my true friends, and i won't dwell on the mistakes of the past. In regards to my Mi, it is what it is and the best i can do is manage what i can, i can't get caught up in the thoughts and feelings of the illness but work on building my drive and ambition to hopefully over ride the negatives.

Goodbye to worst year of my life

Hello to the beginning of a fantastic new start.

Thank you

Re: 2015 How will you plan to enjoy time with others?

Hey @kato 

I'm SO pleased for you that it went well. Good for you not bailing at the first sign of awkwardness! Being open to a genuine honest discussion about what happened was great. And it worked. Woman Very HappyThat is fantastic. Now you know these are true friends, and they've laid it on the line. It is good you have also figured out that others have more entrneched positions, and can accept that rather than feeling the need to persuade them or argue the unfairness of it. Wow, what an excellent start to the new year. I hope it continues to be a positive growing experience.

Kindest regards,

Kristin

Re: 2015 How will you plan to enjoy time with others?

dear Sandy Aka Allessandra1992,

People don't nag, they just need to get things done!!
and others are not aware that things need to be done!!
gossipping comes in 2 ways.....
1 fooling around and being Angelina's nemesis
2. Saying things for your own self importance. when My darling ex husband was put in hospital for two weeks some time ago, both my mother in law and my mother went out for coffee. well, you would think that my Mother in Law needed to air out what was happening with her son but no....my Mum got in first and told her of this terrible car accident I had and that the trauma it inflicted on her......well, that caused a myriad of problems which I have managed to avoid because I just got on with my life.

enuf feeling the past.
I'm doing so,e tapestry and will sew the tapestry picture design onto some material and will post up on Sane.......
do you have time???

Anne

Re: 2015 How will you plan to enjoy time with others?

Nanu Nanu.

walking...??? do cha have to stop for coffees????
Fingers crossed that youlle be napping!!
May the course be with you.
Date was good. He came over this morning to fix my back gate. Brownie points.
nice person. He speaks very softly and works with horses.
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