Lived Experience Forum

[thezooboy]

I don't think I have schizophrenia but I do talk to myself while walking around in circles, I sometimes remember things that aren't there when I get back to them, and I think about stealing stuff and come up with intricate plans on how to do it.

I don't worry too much about the talking to myself thing; it's usually about alternative reality takes on my day, and I've read of quite a few writers (Enid Blyton, Jacqueline Wilson) who've done it as kids. I'm 16 tho and I'm still doing it.
With the stealing its definitely a bit weird. I don't think normal people pass by libraries and think of ways to steal the books; like crossing out the checkout number and passing it off as as part of the library's books-that-can-be-bought collection thus paying less for it.
Another time I was at the school canteen and told the lunch lady I'd made an order for chips and she gave  them to me. I lied when I said I'd payed for it.
And on the school sports field I saw some guys food that I liked on the sidelines, the guy was on the pitch playing soccer. I pretended to drop my jacket and I dropped it over the food. I wrapped the food in my jacket and carried it away. I did this just a year or two ago.
My memory's the worst I forget what I'm doing when I'm in the middle of it, and when people give instructions to me I say yes but then I go and do the absolute wrong thing and am so confused when ppl are upset about it.
I also have pretty bad eyesight and even a pile of jackets dumped on the floor can look like a resting person to me. When I was young I missed of 2yrs of school so I thought that the other children who could see better had 'special training' in the year I missed.
I am also terribly antisocial and when I'm with ppl it's like I'm watching a movie, with them in it, and Im never able to match their pace while walking along, and am terribly stiff when they link arms, and sudden touches give me burning, sometimes numbing feelings if their skin is has a really soft texture.

I don't know if all these things are normal, I don't really like being normal because it looks so repetitive and flimsy but a lot of ppl do not think that I am okay even tho I'm okay with myself mostly...I'm just wondering if I should be worried over the above stuff. Is it right to do things like that and have those feelings?

[Maggie]

@thezooboy  Just read your post and realised you are 16. Just letting you know the forums are for 18 and over age group.

There is Kidsline if you are interested in contacting them. Take care.  

[Maggie]

Kids helpline 24 hr . 1800 55 1800. @thezooboy . Leaving this info for you.

[outlander]

hi @thezooboy and welcome
unfortunatley the sane forums are for those 18 and over but there are other forums you might be interested in taking a look at such as

Beyond blue which are open to all ages and also ReachOut which are aimed at people between 14 and 25

ill link them both here for you

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/

https://forums.au.reachout.com/

[MrX1]

If you are ok with walking around and talking to yourself that is fine. What is not fine is that you are stealing things from other people which is not only against the law but create victims of your actions. Therefore your behaviour is negatively affecting others which is not ok.

you need to speak to someone so the aspect of your stealing can be addressed and you are not affecting the lives of other with all your victims in your wake.

This type of behaviour is no good for you, it will obviously impact you having a positive lifestyle if you continue to steal.