Lived Experience Forum

[bha]

Let Me Go... 

You don't know me
But I know you
I am nothing
I am not here
But you are
You can’t see me
But I can see you
You can’t see my misery or my agony

You see colours
You laugh
You taste
I don't
No, actually I do
I see misery, torture, black, black and more black
I taste sour and bitter
I do laugh, but only to hide my tears

You recall good memories
You plan your future
I don’t remember my past
And I don’t want any future
Both ends are black
Both are sealed
I am squeezed in-between
This is my life
Always in-between
Between misery and agony
Between black and black
Between death and death
Between no-where and no-where
Is that life?

I am not here
Or there
I don't exist
Or I wish I didn’t
Who is enjoying my misery?
Why don't you let me go?
You like it here, I don't
I really tried to stay

I wanted to be like you
And you tried to help me be you
I failed, and so did you
Please, let me go... 

I won’t tell them what you did to me
I don't, actually, remember anything
I can only see black, black, and more black
Please, let me go...

[Former-Member]

hello @bha

how are you feeling?

just wanting to express yourself?

I am not an expert but i am a good listener.

[NikNik]

Hi @bha

Welcome back. I recall your post back in September about stigma.

How have you been?

[bha]

Thanks.
Yes, I just wanted to express myself.

[bha]

I am OK.
Thank you for asking.

[Former-Member]

hello @bha

I haven't met you on here before as I am fairly new.

I was concerned and am relieved that you are ok.

Thank goodness we can express ourselves on here. It helps so much doesn't it. It doesn't cure but is nice to know that people care enough to respond.

Take care my friend.