Christian Chat

[heartathome]

@DownMoreThanUp@Appleblossom @Shaz51 @REDLINEZ750 @ENKELI 

I wrote this poem 30 years ago; I had to forgive my ex-husband. It was a turbulent 18-month marriage. I was also trying to forgive my uncle for sexual abuse, as a kid. Forgiving him at that time was mostly for me! The only way I could forgive him, was to imagine he was a 1-year-old, putting his arms up for me to pick him up. I was able to do that! 

Injustice

Injustice is a fact of life

It happens everyday

Our reaction is a choice

To forgive or make them pay

"Give hurt to God", people say

I have to wonder how

I struggle with two worlds within

I seek the justice now

A silent world to show the pain

I'll make you pay somehow

If that doesn't work, there's more to come

I'll pick until we row

You are wrong, I am right

I want it stamped and sealed

I want justice; It belongs to me

Retaliation, that's my shield

My own defences are cruel and low

I care but can't show how

I want that apology that you owe

I'll fight until you bow

It's not the way I want to be

but it happens every time

It's wrong, I know. I want to change

but who will pay the crime?

Holding onto hurt does what?

Does it cause them pain?

Does it help if both lose out?

Who does it really gain?

Satan, I'm sure, sit's back and laughs

Pride is his special tool

He gets his way when conflict lasts

It's him, not God who rules

Seeking justice here and now

Will never bring us gain

It's not God's way and never will

We need to feel the pain

"It hurt", we cry; it shouldn't be

The person has to pay

I wonder how Jesus must have felt

on the cross that day

Many times, he suffered unfairly

His life was so unjust

He taught us many things while here

Forgiveness seems a must

They spat on Him; they called Him names

They lied and cheated too

How did He make those people pay?

Just what did this man do?

He loved them while they wanted Him ****

He loved them while they lied

He loved them while they nailed his hands

He forgave them when He ****

We love the Lord but not each other

No excused now

Jesus tells us what to do

His life will show us how

He didn't say it would be easy

In fact, He knew we'd fall

That's why He stayed upon the cross

He waits for us to call

The longer we hold our hurt and pain

The more resentment grows

The tighter and closer we hold it now

Means the harder it'll be to let go

It's up to us, what we choose

God won't force His way

We choose to get what is due

Or love and forgive this day

Look at Jesus; go His way

I know it's for our best

Although it's hard, it's worth the effort

His life has promised rest!

[DownMoreThanUp]

@heartathome  Your poem is giving words to the 'silent scream' all victims of abuse go through. What a battle it can be to forgive hey? And then to forgive from the heart! i have really struggled there as well, and i think any victim of abuse does. And so understandable!

To be crucified with Jesus like that is no fun is it?

Yet i have learned that to be on Jesus' side about this, worked very much better for my inner healing, than this unholy fire/rage that wanted to make those who wronged me pay for what they did. Now i understand that the very evil that hurt me so badly will also end up hurting them. This realisation is what made me able to forgive them. For their evil took me to hell and back for years! And i know it will them too if it hasn't already.

[ENKELI]

That is a great poem @heartathome.

I understand about forgiveness being for you.

I have to repeatedly forgive my ex friend for the trauma she caused me. I pray for God to remove my heart of stone and replace it with a heart of flesh (Ezekiel 36:26) regarding this person because there are days I want her to truly suffer like she made me suffer. 

She was a Christian as well so I feel doubly bad about wishing ill on her. 

Are you able to more easily give hurt to God now?

I find it easier the older I get and the softer my heart is/the nearer I draw to God.

Thank you for sharing your work with us, I appreciate it especially 🙏 🥰❤️

[heartathome]

Thank you @DownMoreThanUp. Forgiveness has been one the hardest thing I've struggled with! I may not have done what he did but I've hurt many people that have been through my life, especially back then. I was full of rage! I can now leave it with God. I know this site is strength based and not trauma based, and I need to be careful not to trigger anyone with what I write! It doesn't affect me like it did 30 years ago, thanks to God, my psychiatrist, friends, strangers and church. I can talk about it openly now, following intensive therapy for many years. I wanted to forgive like Jesus has forgiven me! 

@ENKELI @Appleblossom @Shaz51 @REDLINEZ750 

[DownMoreThanUp]

@heartathome You sure echo my feelings here as well!

" thanks to God, my psychiatrist, friends, strangers and church. I can talk about it openly now, following intensive therapy for many years. I wanted to forgive like Jesus has forgiven me! "

[heartathome]

Thanks so much for that encouragement, @ENKELI ! I know you're pretty quiet on here, so I really appreciate it! I struggle with my relationship with God. I'm stubborn and rebellious and like to have control! I don't like being told what to do and I have trouble trusting. I'm getting out of my comfort zone because I'm posting stuff I haven't shown many people. Now Australia can see it! It's hard for me to be so vulnerable! I don't read the bible much but talk to God throughout the day. I do read one verse a day through an app and go to a bible study weekly. I find I keep taking my hurts back from God. I have to keep giving them back to Him. It hasn't been a one-time prayer for me. I like being older and more relaxed. My heart has really softened over the last 30 years because of God, age and the people around me.

[heartathome]

Thanks for sharing that @DownMoreThanUp  How could I not forgive others when God has forgiven me so much! It took many years of struggling with it before I could forgive someone who took so much from me. I love Jesus and all that He portrays! 🙃

[DownMoreThanUp]

@heartathome 

"I love Jesus and all that He portrays! 🙃"

This means we are family forever!🎉

Jesus taught me to read the bible spiritually (1 cor 2,) and no longer literally. Unbelievable what an awesome book The Bible becomes when The Spirit speaks it inside our hearts, and not as religion has taught me to understand His Word.

All of the Bible becomes a spiritual story inside our own lives when we read the bible through the spirit of Jesus. For then we heed His word inside our hearts as they were meant to be listen to then His Word is always for us dwelling within. For when we heed the Spirit of Truth, God's love rules our hearts, and i know that God's love/goodness is what EVERYONE down here craves after religion has kept away from us teaching the word of God as they have so often done. For example I love Psalm 119 and the books of Proverbs now, as well as the fact Jesus died for our sins not the way (i thought) our Heavenly Father did that, before i learned to read The bible spiritually, i thought some out of touch do gooder wrote Psalm 119 and Proverbs and God was cruel demanding the death of an innocent loving man, to pay for the evildoers down here.

Then i met the crucified God in my life and my big I changed forever to small i thinking like that.😀

Zion Descending

At first I heard Dad say,
"Son let us make tracks,
its near getting dark now,
the chosen are all asleep,
now would be best,
as darkness reigns its peak,
for arrogance has him blinded,
to what is really going on."

I saw the sunlight darkened,
the moon turn to blood,
and the stars falling from Heaven.
I felt everything shaking in its boots.
I heard about wars and rumours of wars.
I experienced famine and drought,
grand scale living in wantonness,
rulers making a living out of sin,
Satan's forces installed everywhere,
loveless forces ruling untruthfully.

I heard my inner world crying out in her dying pain,
"What is going on?
The Father is leaving us without the Son,
this can only evil mean."
I heard the angels blow the trumpets!
"Woe to the inhabitants of this soul!"

I heard the agonising cries,
coming from underneath the altar,
the dead in God's love, longingly,
awaiting newness of life!
"Yes, oh Lord, pour out their blood as they did ours!"

I heard the thunders rolling throughout my being,
"Let evil brood fear The Truth of God almighty!
Let judgement begin in The House of God!"

I knew judgement had already began,
when I beheld those massive hails stones,
tumbling down on the heads of the wicked.
I watched my enemies flee in terror!
Scorpion stings burning wrong,
horse hooves kicking up dirt,
truthfulness uncovering shame,
honesty baring nakedness,
the dung of the earth warring,
lies sores causing agony,
pestilence threatening,
as grasshoppers devoured,
my enemies food and good life!

It was fascinating to see,
how weak those are...,
.....so strong in lies!

Yes, honest!
Loving truth is like that!
The freedom to be,
true to yourself,
both in good and bad,
in His love to be.

Oh the release of faith!
Heart rendering awe!
Shouts of glorious praise!
Jumping joy - pure ecstasy!
Glorying in God almighty,
my life's tormentors died,
perishing one after the other.

Seeing Jesus on His white horse,
a blazing sword coming out of His mouth,
His all conquering loving truth
my inner world of being to reap.
Casting dead what is so good to have gone,
raising alive that which I had lost,
bringing new life at each dawn,
His kingdom ruling my world of being,
His presence bringing rest and peace.

Time and again He comes past like this,
(terrorising the wicked agonising their mates demise,)
as all His wheels turn into place.
The Word alive in heavenly love.
Costly gifts descending from above.
beholding the temple of the most high,
the truth of His love Himself my Zion.

[heartathome]

I'm sorry @DownMoreThanUp I really don't want to get that far into religion or spirit led talks. I was in a Pentecostal cult for two years and now want to keep it very simple! 

[PeppyPatti]

@DownMoreThanUp @heartathome @ENKELI @Appleblossom @Shaz51 

Um......sorry. I'm very sorry . ATM this is not.