Trying makes it worse

[EternalFlower]

Hi, 

I'm EternalFlower and I've been feeling completely overwhelmed, sad, and pessimistic.

I've tried and been a responsible patient and person, reaching out to various services when I started feeling scarily anxious and suicidal, 2 years back..

My Dr is new, a young guy who regularly admits he's inexperienced, and aside from some good jokes, he actually does very little

I notice how easy it is to blame myself that I don't feel better, a total shame spiral,  but I wander if my treatments just are bad....

I wanted to chat and hear anyone and hope I can use this space to help not feel so alone.

Thanks xxx EternalFlower

[maddison]

Hi @EternalFlower 

No you are not alone💜

[chibam]

Hi @EternalFlower . Welcome to the forums! 🙂

Let's just say that you certainly wouldn't be the first patient to have gotten bad treatment from the mental health system.

There are plenty of us on here who know that situation all too well.

If anything, I think it sounds pretty impressive that your therapist has enough integrity to admit that he's very inexperianced. Although I guess it would be even more impressive if he transferred you over to a differant therapist who was more capable of helping you.

Were you assigned to your therapist by your GP? If so, could you maybe talk to your GP about being reassigned to a more helpful therapist?

I've heard that the wait times for starting with new therapists are atrocious these days, though... what with coronavirus and the floods and all...

[NatureLover]

Hi @EternalFlower , I like your username 🙂

Can I ask, is your Dr your therapist, or a GP? I wasn't sure...

And I also wonder if you're on any medication for depression? 

I hope things turn around for you soon...

[EternalFlower]

Hi @NatureLover ! Nice to get yr reply

My therapist is a psychiatrist who I see for therapy and meds, not ads but some sleep medication. 

[Historylover]

You're definitely not alone, @EternalFlower. I have no advice. We don't need chat from our doctors. We need them to help us, to help us fix our selves and our lives. It's sad that so many of us only have the folks on this forum to depend on. Sending best wishes. Hope today is a good one.

[maddison]

Hello @EternalFlower 

How are you feeling today?

Shame spirals suck! 

Thankyou for reaching out. There are so many lovely people on this site. 💜I hope you feel better soon.

[Scream58]

Hi @EternalFlower you are definitely not alone. 

[wellwellwellnez]

Younger therapists can be useful. They're mold-able and up to date and stuff. You already have yourself as an expert in yourself.

The joke making suggests the young doc likes to be liked, which is also kind of promising (though admittedly sometimes tiresome). Remember to let the therapist know when they get something right. Positive reinforcement and all.

[EternalFlower]

Hi wellwellwellnez

Love Ur name and pic.

I saw him today and I asked him flat out what his approach was to help me with trauma.

In a way it was good, because i was feeling so exhausted and drained and had sort of less of a care-factor.

I think young is good, as well....he suggested I might need a hospital stay at some point.

He did ask me what had helped previously and seemed pretty thrilled by my own answer that 8 prefer peer driven spaces. Proud that I had the words and could vocalise it.

I feel safer the less clinicians around. I like communities of mad ppl and honest ppl.